How To: Buy Influence

It’s no secret that power and influence are commodities that are bought and sold every day. It is a thriving market in which integrity wears a "for sale" sign. This is human nature. To think otherwise is naïve. The halls of power in America buzz with this thriving market, and normally it goes unnoticed by the public (super-lobbyist Jack Abramoff being one of the more rare -- and high profile -- exceptions).

Regardless, there are occasions that demand one’s entrance into this market: A society writer slams you or your wife, union demands are throwing a wrench into production, or impending tax legislation threatens to cost you millions. When the time comes, you should know how to approach the journalists, politicians, union leaders, public detractors, judges, and any other influence-wielding gatekeepers whose assistance you might need.

Getting that influence swayed in your direction requires an understanding of the psychological makeup behind each personality. Since money alone won’t always suffice, you should begin by identifying how your approach ought to be tailored toward their particular type; toward spotting and exploiting their individual Achilles heel.

Journalists and gossip columnists
There isn’t a gossip columnist alive who doesn’t crave a good story or something to talk about. The very nature of gossiping about the private lives of others suggests an individual with a low integrity threshold. Add to it the fact that most of these columnists already enjoy a give-and-take relationship with the people they write about; they provide ostensibly "free" -- or at least, "hands-free" -- press for names in the news. Their fellow journalists are not too different, each craving to break a major story in order to step front and center into the public eye.

To buy a journalist's influence, consider offering your own influence to help bolster their wider profile. Promises of a speaking tour or even a book deal (a collection of columns, perhaps?) might be sufficiently intriguing to sway your case or, since many journalists dream of being novelists, you could use your own influence to set them up with the right editor at a publishing house.

Plan B: Numerous people work above the writers of newspapers and magazines, both in print and online. These people may better understand your situation -- perhaps in exchange for their own favors -- and can see to it that the writer in question is either openly demoted or starts to receive assignments meant for younger or inexperienced writers.

Politicians
Congressional representatives, governors, mayors, city council members, and those in virtually every political position are all vulnerable to sway. Few, if any, politicians sustain their do-gooder mentality for long before they become jaded. Some don’t have such a mentality to begin with, but simply crave the power and influence associated with political posts. This "appreciation" for their own power is one of human nature’s Achilles heels -- a typical downfall for any disgraced politician.

In this case, money really does talk. You can fund a politician’s pet project or make campaign contributions, since politicians cannot keep their jobs without special-interest money. Yet you may see more success in securing their influence if you can make promises, post-politics, for them to serve either on prestigious corporate boards or as high-priced, do-nothing “consultants.”

Plan B: In the event that your efforts fail or even backfire, you can consider blackmail, but you may be better off by making known your intentions to support the politician's opponent in the next election. In addition, this will demonstrate the measures you can take to ensure his term is considered deeply ineffective -- by constituents and fellow politicians alike.

A few more influential people you may need to buy influence from in the future

Union leaders
In the U.S., the National Labor Relations Act (NLRA) guarantees all employees the legal right to form a union, and the same act declares it unfair labor practice on your part to prevent them from doing so. Unions can do you a tremendous amount of damage to you in a wide variety of ways.

However, union leaders typically come out of the workforce itself and can be vulnerable to -- or perhaps even accustomed to -- bribery, whether it be straight cash, vacations or other gifts. A raise or a promotion, however, is likely to raise red flags.

Plan B: If that doesn’t work, recall that union leaders are appointed from within. Therefore, if your efforts with one leader fail, take a page from the CIA’s playbook and work quietly to promote a candidate or leadership more favorable to your interests.

Public detractors
Public detractors, such as environmental activists, are bound to create problems for you, particularly if your business plans encroach on natural reserves or natural habitats. As you may already have experienced, these are typically highly principled or at least highly devoted types for whom offers of money do little.

However, they do understand sacrifice. So consider offering something else that would be in their interests, but that won't get in the way of yours. For example, offer to create an ecological or environmental endowment, either in their name or the name of their organization. The mentality you want to instill in them is this: “Either I can fight for A and potentially lose, or I can sacrifice A for B; isn’t it worthwhile to gain B even at the cost of losing A?”

Plan B: Go after their credibility. Because public detractors shout the loudest and claim so much righteousness, the best way to undercut their power to hurt you is to undermine their credibility as defenders of the public good. A good private investigator can dig up just about anything you need in this regard.

Judges
The U.S. Constitution dictates that Supreme Court justices, court of appeals judges and district court judges are nominated by the President and confirmed by the United States Senate. They enjoy lifetime tenure.

However, lower court judges and State judges are often elected officials; they must campaign for their job, and thus operate no differently than politicians do, making campaign contributions an essential tool to buy influence. All too often, U.S. voters are far more concerned with other elected officials to pay attention to the judicial races, so numerous such races are bought every election year. The results of an American Bar Association poll show that most Americans believe in the justice system despite not understanding many of its inner workings.
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Plan B: If buying an election fails and you need to influence a sitting judge, keep in mind that the huge majority of (but not all) States require judges to have experience as attorneys. And keep in mind that, while some judges may enjoy serving smaller, municipal courts, most have the higher courts in mind. If you have the influence to get a judge appointed to a higher bench, dangle that carrot accordingly, albeit with caution.

Gatekeepers
The men and women who determine access into country clubs or private schools are well aware of their power and influence. Their judgments decide which children enjoy the best education and which businessmen enjoy the networking opportunities afforded by the most exclusive country clubs.

They’re no strangers to efforts at bribery. Yet, while money may indeed buy you the necessary influence, you have no idea what kind of bribery offers you’re competing against. Without that knowledge, you’re best avoiding basic pecuniary bribery. Rather, for people who enjoy a position of power such as these, in order to get yourself or your children in the door, you should consider what’s in it for him. What can he gain? Depending on the situation, perhaps the offer of a relatively lucrative or prestigious job -- either within your company or through one of your contacts -- will see your "bribe" outdo the competition.

Plan B: Keepers of the gate are never lords of the manor. Your second-best chance is to go over their heads.